I stepped up to order a quick take-out lunch at the counter of a Mexican restaurant. The waitress greeted me and asked for my order. I greeted her back by smiling and saying hello, and then placed my order. When she handed me a cup for my drink I reminded her that I hadn’t ordered a drink. She responded that she was giving me a free drink because I had been so nice to her.

So nice to her?

I had simply smiled and said hello. That was “so nice”?

Maybe it’s just me but there seems to be less overall kindness and care for others in the world lately. And I can only imagine that being in the service industry, one experiences a lot of unkindness. Rude customers, entitled attitudes or simply those who want their goods without having to say hello, please or thank you. Give me what I want and give it to me now.

That this young woman was so touched by the fact that I smiled and acknowledged her presence speaks volumes of the importance of even the smallest kindnesses we offer to one another.

So, what is kindness, really, and why is it a big deal?

If we want to know how to be kind we need to go to the source…God. He created kindness and embodies it in everything He does. In Romans 2:4 we read about what God’s kindness does for us.

“Don’t you see how wonderfully kind, tolerant, and patient God is with you? Does this mean nothing to you? Can’t you see that his kindness is intended to turn you from your sin?” (NLT)

God’s kindness makes us feel so cared for and valued that it causes us to choose to turn from death (sin) to life (God).

Kindness elicits a response.

The word kindness in this verse is the Greek word chréstotés. It means goodness, uprightness, benignity.  It is also defined as “useful kindness” and refers to meeting real needs, in God’s way, in His timing or fashion; a kindly or gracious act.

In addition, chréstotés is defined as a “divine kindness, the Spirit-produced goodness which meets the need and avoids human harshness and cruelty.” (from Strong’s concordance)

God’s kindness leads us to life. Our kindness to others can do the same. Kindness, especially when it is unexpected or undeserved, breathes life into a person or a situation.

So, how do we develop kindness?

Kindness comes in two ways.

First, it’s a fruit of the Spirit (see Galatians 5:22-23), which means it naturally develops in us more and more as we spend time with God, becoming more like Jesus. It becomes a natural overflow of a life spent in fellowship with God; just as fruit is a natural result of a fruit tree being planted in good soil, producing what it’s meant to produce.

Kindness is also a choice. We often have to choose to be kind in difficult situations. If you haven’t been kind lately, there is hope! You can repent. Do you know what the word repent means? The Greek word used in the Bible is metanoia. It means a change of mind, change in the inner man. As we saw earlier, God’s kindness brings us the place of repentance; a choice to change our minds which enables us to change our outward behavior.

So…

+Do you have a habit of being unkind to others or to yourself? Allow God’s kindness to help you make a decision to repent—to change your mind—in how you have been thinking or acting.

+Kindness is a choice and it will become easier as that fruit of the Spirit grows in you, naturally overflowing to those you interact with. By cultivating a habit of prayer, reading the Bible, and intentionally remaining in Christ, that fruit will grow. (Read more here about practical ways to remain in Christ).

There is a great quote that says:

“Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.” (Ian Mclaren)

Isn’t that true? And most of the time we don’t know how difficult it is. This week let’s be mindful about kindness; in the way we think, speak and act toward others and ourselves. Kindness to your spouse, to your friends, to your co-workers, to the person waiting on you at the dry cleaners or the grocery store.

Let your kindness breathe life and hope into someone’s life today.